Im not sure who is going to read this but this is a topic that has been bothering me for the past year since my baby was born S
ORRY FOR THE LONG POST BUT THIS IS SOMETHING CLOSE TO MY
AND I DONT OFFEN LET IT ALL OUT LIKE THIS!
This a big shout of to all mums in general but a big Shout out to First time mums stressed out or anxious about their journey to motherhood or maybe those who have already become mums for the first time ?
This is a matter thats been bothering me since my baby was born recently.
This time around i have just noticed a lot more than i did my first time. Maybe i am more experienced and know more about what stuggles and stress a mother goes though when she brings her little gift into this world.
These days with social media and mums forums and blogs i think there is so many options out there it can get overwhelming especially if you are first time mom. Like how do you chose the right way of sleeping? travel ? feeding? for your baby when there is so many options out there trust me if you are stressing about it your already doing your best? If you like a moses basket more than a crib or a a cot better than a cot bed or sleep next to me either one is not going to hurt your baby trust your self its more whats convenient for YOU!!!!! Even with pushchairs your baby is not going to get hurt if you choose not to get that £1000 strokke pushchair and choose an option that more suitable for you, there is so much pressure these days to be so perfect. Its more of a personal preference if you know what i mean its not a MUST HAVE !
There is so much pressure on moms these days TO be perfect but no one is perfect we have to remind us self!!!!!
As though being pregnant and preparing for a new baby to come is not enoght pressure.
Which brings me to all this nasty ” mommy shaming”?
You planned a natrual normal birth with no epidural but instead you ended up having a c- section or you ended up having epidural after feeling the pain Or you planned for c-section because its ur choice or maybe you had one previously. Other mums acually think c-section is the easy way out ?. point is matter how you bring YOUR child into this world no one has the right to make you feel you are less than a mother because you had a c-section if it was unexpected you probably already feel disappointed your birth plan didn’t go to plan. Its Okay you did what you had to to bring your baby into this world so well done ???You dont need any one to say you are any less than a mother because you have delivered naturally or by c-section !! And the shocking part is most of these people are moms them self! I have not had a c section my self and i could never imagine telling some who has that i am more a mom because i had my baby though natrual birth or that they dont know what it is like to give birth because they had it though surgery they know what it is like! Its ridiculous how its okay on social media to make other mothers feel smaller than them self.
Or to judge them for conceiving though IVF!! Its all wrong!
WE ( all of us mums) should support one another in whatever choices WE make. Not force our options onto other mums by judging them. This causes MAJOR anxiety and depression for 100’s of mums because they believe they are smaller or less mums because they do things different.
Which brings me to the biggest issue of everything
” Feeding your baby”
feeding your baby what is right for your baby and you its a choice you have as a mother yes now everyone says breastfeeding is best ? and there is no doubt about how special and nutritional breast milk is? (so please kindly no nasty comments) but to think moms who can go into depression and beat them self up about its unnecessary! I’ve seen #fedisbest post and breastfeeding moms are judging that saying by saying NO BREASTFED IS BEST( YES IT IS FOR SOME! for others its not? I know a happy mom makes a happy baby! Just because i have chosen to breastfeed as that suited me it might not suit someone else and it does not mean i have the right to shame any moms who chose formula! I believe a fed baby is the best!!!!!! Its disgusting as though we haven’t been through enough being pregnant for 9 months hours of hardcore pain during labour and adjusting with a newborn to feel ashamed of our choices! The goverment mainly changed it to breastfeeding is best campain because of social and political reasons to help people not get into debt as breastfeeding is free and women was not even trying to breast feed just staight on to formula milk( please dont jump at my throat now! Yes breastfeeding is awesome? its unique ?and has the best nutritions! ?But for many moms its not possible and being judged by breastfeeding moms is not healthy and makes so many new moms into depression and anxiety if they wished and hoped they could breastfed and then for some reason it does not happen or go to plan they feel less of a mum and formula saves loads of little premies lifes it does not make kids stupid or fat!
Honestly mommies stop shaming each other and respect each other!
Please Respect that every mom is different just as every child is! Feeding IS best!
By saying that does not mean breast milk is less special or unique it just means that a fed baby is the best!
And Happy mommies and baby babies are best!
So To all mommies out there YOU ARE AMAZING NO MATTER HOW YOU GOT PREGNANT ( naturally, by accident, planned or ivf) You deserve as much regardless to how you got pregnant to HOW YOU GAVE BIRTH OR HOW YOU FEED OR RISE YOUR CHILD! AS LONG AS YOU LOVE YOUR CHILD AND WANT AND DO THE BEST FOR THEM YOUR AN AMAZING MOM ????
So please if you are doubting your mum skills because someone said something to you or you read something or your journey to motherhood didn’t go to plan please take a minute and give your self a HUGE applause?? because YOU ARE TRYING YOUR BEST AND YOU WILL MASTER BEING A MUM TO YOUR CHILD??
There is so much hate going around in the world!
Please lets take time to spead love instead of hate!